


Mental void

by Paper_Panda



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Armitage Hux is a Jerk, F/M, Hux Has No Chill, Hux is Not Nice, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-09-17 02:58:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16966407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paper_Panda/pseuds/Paper_Panda
Summary: General Hux visiting you in the hospital





	Mental void

You laid there quietly, keeping your eyes closed, matching your breaths to the beeping of the machines that surrounded the bed, the only indications of your heartbeat, your existence.  
Your legs were numb. Curiosity slowly pried open your swollen eyes to meet a dismal view of a grey colored hospital room, the door a navy blue. You immediately knew it was locked, this was to keep you in here, not them out.  
You slid your eyes sideways, they’d handcuffed your wrists to the bed bars. Short, but plenty deep cuts ran along your arms, beyond was your chart.

The door slid open and someone has entered the room.  
It was no one else but Armitage Hux, general of the First Order himself.  
“Ah! I see you are finally awake. How do you feel?” ginger man asked, his look was full of revulsion and disapproval. He walked closer to your bed, removing his leather gloves on the way.

“You want to know more about my mental illness but you’re scared to ask, that’s right isn’t it. How did I know that? I know these things, plus it’s kinda obvious after what have I done on the Jakku,” you almost giggled but your laughter quickly faded away. “I almost got it, Hux. And I don’t regret!”

He winced and shook his head. “Why would I be scared to ask about such a stupid thing. Do you think I care about your little, fragile mind? To be completely honest I am surprised that no one ever noticed how distorted your mind and behavior are,” Hux explained, observing every inch of your body. “I always thought that mental illness drives the madness that helps in killing. Apparently, it pushes you more into self-destruction,” man muttered, leaning over you.

You shrugged. “You think I care. As soon as I will leave this room, I’ll try once again. And once again, and once again, until I will win,” you smirked as you rolled your eyes, your blood preassure has incrased and it hit you hard. “I won’t be serving as one of your killing machines, I would rather die than take part in all this.”

General completely ignored your bubbling and continued with his own thoughts.  
“I am deeply shocked that you tried to desert, you were one of the best soldiers.  
How could you? We gave you everything,” he said, looking around, and then his eyes moved to you. “Leave this room? Do you really think we will let you go anyway, just like that? You are really crazy.”

You laughed shortly, trying to get up from bed. “Trust me, I will end that cruel crusade, sooner or later. First Order cannot just take whatever it wants. You’ll be dead soon, trust me, General,” you struggled with ties. “There’s more than just me among your people. A lot of them don’t agree with your policy. You’ll see this, soon.”

Hux smiled, watching your struggles.  
“Oh, trust me, no one is going to stand against me or The First Order. I will have to make sure they will dig deeper into your mind, hope that some more indoctrination and some tortures will be just fine for you. I would use someone like you among my people,” he said, gripping your chin and forcing you to look at him.  
“You will be just fine, sweetheart.”

You spitted straight at his face, than laughed shortly, showing your teeth.  
“I think you should leave now, General,” you said simply, turning your head aside. “We’re brought up in culture of fear and coercion, so what do you think comes out first when the mind loosens? That’s right, it is the scariest damn thing that can ever happen to you. The devil himself will come and unless you can face down every fear, own your guilt in a healthy way, you’re screwed, Hux. I know what have you done many years ago, so you do, too. It hunts you every sleepless night, right?”

Hux chuckled, wiping the spit from his face.  
“Listen, there was someone who thought just like you. He didn’t end up well and no, it doesn’t hunt me. I am more than happy that this old bastard is dead and I am happy with what I’ve done,” he put his gloves back on and petted your head. “If I can be completely honest, I don’t care about you nor others. You are just a cannon fodder. You are replaceable, no one care if you are dead or alive, no one will cry after your eventual death,” man hummed, looking at you, “I do hope that some high voltage will help restore your mindset, so… Hopefully see you soon, CS-445 or Y/N.”

After these words he simply left your room.

You struggled few more moments but when no result has come, you had given up.  
You put your head on a pillow, sighing loudly, deep inside you knew it was the beginning of your true end. Hux was a cruel, emotionless man, and you knew he would have done whatever to keep First Order strong. Your mind was dark, subsisting on the burnt tinder of who you were. In these ashes there was nothing to even renew a spark. All you could do was huddle in this moment, live from heartbeat to heartbeat. You felt like the world wasn’t really there at all, like it was stolen and replaced with something empty, photo-shopped, fake. It made sense in a weird way, the real world gave you feelings of joy. You felt connected to it, part of it.  
But either it was taken away or you were; every second of every minute of every day, all you could do was to float in the void.


End file.
